Snowman Theory ©

I first came up with Snowman Theory © in 2012 after another mini drama!

A bleak, empty, cold, overwhelming disappointment and heartbreak, like this;

Let me start at the beginning.

You meet a man and your world comes to life like in all the good love stories. He’s not just another (snow)man, he’s in your home, he’s in your world. He’s exploring your house, you play together, laugh and you rediscover the magic of the mundane.

LAUGHING. Always laughing.

… then you set out for an adventure!

You find a motorbike and play in the garden, it’s cold, but you don’t care! You’re delighted, and still laughing!

You take that LEAP, you fly, you soar… you fall in love.

Above the world, gilding above everyone else… They are all existing, you are living.

It’s a romantic adventure of next level proportions. Your heart is light, the northern lights glitter and THIS IS HAPPINESS… that… that is what it’s all about. Connection, trust, sameness. Together. Flying. Off to Santa’s party in the woods! Meeting his friends, dancing, drinking, enjoying together. Your worlds are colliding, together you create a new universe and a whole new perspective.

Such joy! Sleepy, you fly home together. What a magical adventure, you feel close to someone, safe, happy… full of HOPE!

You wake up the next morning and the memory gently slides into your awareness and you refill with that same warmness. Delighted and excited, you jump out of bed and run to see him.

You run outside and the spineless motherfu**er has MELTED.

This is heartbreak in its purest form. Sheer disappointment, grief and feelings of confusion and pointless waste.

Wasn’t it was great? Romantic, fun, deliriously delightful?

Yeah but thanks… He’s had his fun.. CYA BYE. I’m slush now. CIAO!

Gone.

It was nice while it lasted but it’s over.

This is Snowman Theory © . They melt.

What can we learn from this?

Watch out for excessively “charming” people they are flaunting their ego, not engaging in emotional connection, even if you are.

Do you know what EGO is?

Ego is the part of us that wants to win, it wants attention, to be praised and recognized. Ego needs to be right and to show off. Ego lacks grace, manners and decorum. Ego doesn’t understand the refined happiness of being understated, secure and humble; ego wants to be entertained, praised, flattered and is very very self-indulgent.

When we let go of the ego, we take life at the correct and natural pace, we live within our limits , following our true instinct; NOT the need for constant activity and attention. When we are quiet, our immature ego will bugger off and leave us to our instincts.

Women with ego problems tend to chase men with ego problems… both are seeking attention and engaging in power struggles. This is a two way street. Let it go!

Ways to stop a snowman from melting?

Play it cool.

Throw snowballs at them. (Be mean, it confounds the ego.)

Leave them outside. (Ignore them, the ego is comprised of both EXCESSIVE positive and negative self-esteem, this is why it needs so much reassurance. Without reassurance they chase your attention and affection; when they get it then they are satisfied, free to melt onto their next diversion.)

Or… just enjoy the fun and accept the certain and imminent end to your adventure. Snowmen and Snow-women are easy to spot; a large ego, lively character and a need for attention gives them away!

Good fun, but seasonal.

Don’t pick someone seasonal, we live in the UK, you need to be prepared for all weather.

That was the 2012 version, the 2015 version ends like this;

Move over ice baby :)

If it starts “snowing again” and that MOFO shows up during a Venus Retrograde then send them back to Antarctica for the penguins to piss on.

Penguins mate for life.

:)

CYABYE

XXX

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Hiya, it’s 2025 now.

My written voice hasn’t changed much, I still sound exactly like that 2012 version of me who needed to understand that ice. cold. Saturn Return heartbreak.

I think these days we don’t talk about “ego problems.” Instead, we say “narcissistic personality disorder / bipolar disorder / borderline personality…” etc…

When I wrote this in 2012, I knew I’d tapped into something. Snowman theory was widely appreciated by the young women in my co-work space and my single friends.

We knew the Snowmen were salesmen and banned ourselves from estate agents and recruiters.

What I know now is that sales people have a strong Jupiter or Sagittarius strong in their chart. It’s not a coincidence that The Snowman is so BIG! He’s a Jupitarian!

I didn’t fully understand the EMPTINESS of the narcissist who only knows how to have a good time, spend money, go on adventures and silently leave in the night… all I knew is that this is a predictable pattern that repeated.

So, other than it being December, why am I sharing this again now?

Lily Allen.

I listened to Lily’s album and thought - oh right, she’s like I was in 2012.

I do NOT envy that.

We go looking for magic. Leave the predictable and safe partner and move to New York to be with the glittery movie star.

You cannot be attracted to a man with Mars at 29º Aquarius square to Venus in Taurus unless you have your own freedom vs glamour dilemma.

The breakup may be hard, but it’s reignited the dwindling fame, has it not?

I know the rhetoric is that the narcissist dates the co-dependent and maybe when we are actual clinical territory that’s true. However, as far as I can tell, the narcissists flock together like birds of a feather. Even if they won’t admit it.

Attention seeking people, love each other.

Social climbers, love each other.

People who talk about house prices non-stop, love each other.

Listen, I’m here posting on Instagram all day everyday… and I’ve lived this show-off dynamic more times than I’d care to admit.

I spent years adoring the most fun man in the room.

That 7th house Sagittarius, Sun Uranus conjunction was PROJECTED for YEARS. I’m a Jupitarian, I’m a big energy (when I get dressed and leave the house) but I always tried to find myself in the party boy.

This is why I think Lily Allen is also Gemini Rising.

And the solution?

I’ll leave that to you in the comments!

Join me on the 11th of November for Cosmic Connections, we can talk about it more there!

Love,

Francesca xx